Today has been quite a day.
I met with a friend who lost his father yesterday. Soon I'll meet with the rest of the family and we'll plan services for this weekend.
He's numb. They're all hurting.
Today I also met with another family, with a wonderful lady who knows that her time is short on this earth. She is 65 years young and she is not guaranteed even another week.
So we talked... and cried... and planned.
Tomorrow I'll also meet with another gentleman, a man who recently lost his brother and just last week, his father,...
and who is more than likely going to lose his mother soon.
He's really struggling.
All of this hurt. All of this loss. All of these questions.
And they're coming to... me?
As a pastor (can I be brutally honest?), I often find myself at a loss for words when people are deeply hurting. Many times my eyes well up with tears and I wrestle with what I should say... and what I shouldn't say. I'm flooded with a myriad of Scriptures and platitudes and cliches... and an overwhelming sense... to... just... shut... up.
Moments ago, in the solitude of my office,
I grabbed an old copy of C.S. Lewis' book,
"A Grief Observed".
It's been years since I've read this book. I'm not sure why I grabbed it.
Perhaps I'm looking for some direction and wisdom,
as I find myself in a place that is... hard?
Anyways... on the inside of the cover I found some scribblings that I had jotted down years ago.
I have no idea who originally said this, but in my own hand-writing I just read:
"Creativity does not truly come
from the popularized image of the tormented artist,
struggling with the muse.
True creativity is born in community
as men and women of God listen to each other
and to Him.
As we seek to understand each other's
woundedness
and strengths,
what will be the result?"
Wow.
I'm having a KAIROS moment...
and I guess I wanted to write it down...
and share it with you.
"Lord, may I be a man who is filled with your Spirit,
Your
creative
Holy
Spirit.
May I slow down and listen,
seeking to understand other's wounds...
and hurts...
and strengths.
May I listen for Your voice
and only speak that which I hear You whispering.
Amen."
That quote is from Michael Card. I love it.
ReplyDeleteYou are an amazing person who comforts people with the kindness that you express through your eyes! I have experienced that many times over the years - people don't always need words. I am glad that I know how "awesome" you are! Love you and don't ever stop those tears!
ReplyDeleteI have experienced many times over the years what you described. You didn't know what to say..........just tears. I appreciated those tears and I know that people who meet with you find much comfort in them. Words are not always necessary. Miss you my dear friend!
ReplyDeleteAs a hospice nurse I view these situations as holy ground. You take off your shoes and allow God to minister through you...sometimes through words, sometimes through presence, often through silence. Its an embraceable holy moment for sure. In that alone we are able to carry the pain and the tears of others and self.
ReplyDeleteSo thankful for the Jewish training you have received. The new light God has given you to bring to the old familiar passages is such a blessing to the hearer. Last night ROCKED (again)!!