EPIC FAIL

Ever fail?

I’m talking about falling flat on your face and really screwing things up? This happens to all of us at one time or another. The difference between an average person and one that achieves great things seems to be their perception of and response to failure. Most of us were never taught how to deal with blowing it big time, but if it’s something that we are all going to do at least once in our lives, then why don’t we talk more about “dealing with failure”?

I have failed… much more than once. Sometimes, after counseling or simply talking with someone about an incredibly important subject, once they’ve left… I feel that I failed; “I should have said…” or “I wish I hadn’t said…”. Sometimes after preaching a sermon I feel the same way; “Man, I don’t think I made any sense” or “Why would anyone listen to someone as boring as I was today?”

The truth is that failure is something that all of us must deal with… pretty regularly. J.M. Barrie said, “We are all failures – at least, all the best of us are.” Failure is far more common than success, much like poverty is more prevalent than wealth. However, the difference between those that seem to rise above the crowd and those that continue to meander amidst or below it, is often how an individual views a mistake.

I love movies. I also love comic books. Whenever the two merge, I am first in line. My sons and I have been to the 12:01am showing of almost every superhero movie since they have been old enough to wear their Spider-Man underoos! This past week a comic movie came out, that I have not seen: Conan The Barbarian. The reason I haven’t seen this movie is because the Conan comic was never one of my favorites, and I have heard that the movie was going to be extremely violent [I am not a fan of blood and guts movies].

Well… I guess I'm not alone. The movie is currently bombing at the Box Office. All that money invested in this movie is being flushed down the toilet by horrible critic reviews and audiences giving it a unified ‘thumbs down’. This makes me sorta sad for those involved with a movie like this. For this reason, I was greatly moved when I read a statement by screenwriter Sean Hood, via Quora, offering up a unique insight into something we don't often see with people involved with movies like Conan the Barbarian...his thoughts on what it was like to see the movie "flop". It showed me a man who is currently living smack-dab in the middle of failure and his mature response. I want to share a portion of his statement, in hopes that we’ll all learn something that I believe is really important:

“…For the next couple of days, you walk in a daze, and your friends and family offer kind words, but mostly avoid the subject. Since you had planned (ardently believed, despite it all) that success would propel you to new appointments and opportunities, you find yourself at a loss about what to do next. It can all seem very grim.

You make light of it, of course. You joke and shrug. But the blow to your ego and reputation can't be brushed off. Reviewers, even when they were positive, mocked Conan The Barbarian for its lack of story, lack of characterization, and lack of wit. This doesn't speak well of the screenwriting - and any filmmaker who tells you s/he "doesn't read reviews" just doesn't want to admit how much they sting.

Unfortunately, the work I do as a script doctor is hard to defend if the movie flops. I know that those who have read my Conan shooting script agree that much of the work I did on story and character never made it to screen. I myself know that given the difficulties of rewriting a script in the middle of production, I made vast improvements on the draft that came before me. But its still much like doing great work on a losing campaign. All anyone in the general public knows, all anyone in the industry remembers, is the flop. A loss is a loss.

But one thought this morning has lightened my mood:

My father is a retired trumpet player. I remember, when I was a boy, watching him spend months preparing for an audition with a famous philharmonic. Trumpet positions in major orchestras only become available once every few years. Hundreds of world class players will fly in to try out for these positions from all over the world. I remember my dad coming home from this competition, one that he desperately wanted to win, one that he desperately needed to win because work was so hard to come by. Out of hundreds of candidates and days of auditions and callbacks, my father came in....second.

It was devastating for him. He looked completely numb. To come that close and lose tore out his heart. But the next morning, at 6:00 AM, the same way he had done every morning since the age of 12, he did his mouthpiece drills. He did his warm ups. He practiced his usual routines, the same ones he tells his students they need to play every single day. He didn't take the morning off. He just went on. He was and is a trumpet player and that's what trumpet players do, come success or failure.

Less than a year later, he went on to win a position with the Los Angeles Philharmonic, where he played for three decades. Good thing he kept practicing.

So with my father's example in mind, here I sit, coffee cup steaming in its mug and dog asleep at my feet, starting my work for the day, revising yet another script, working out yet another pitch, thinking of the future (the next project, the next election) because I'm a screenwriter, and that's just what screenwriters do. In the words of Ed Wood, "My next one will be BETTER!"”

Wow.

One of the greatest problems people have with failure is that they are too quick to judge isolated situations in their lives and label them as failures. Instead, they need to keep the bigger picture in mind. When you and I fail, we are not ‘failures’. We may have failed at doing something, but we are not failures. There is a big difference.

I love how Scripture tells us that Jesus instructed His closest friends to shake the dust from their feet and simply go to the next house if they were to fail at bringing someone to an understanding of their Message (Mark 6:11). Why did Jesus tell them this? Could it be that He understood how hard we humans take it when we don't succeed at the things we're endeavoring to accomplish? Jesus knew the truth, which is: At times, we’ll fail... But how you and I respond when we do is what will determine any future success we will have.

May you and I be those that turn our failures into learning moments, and eventually stepping stones for the success that will lead to our God receiving the glory due Him through our lives!